life in and around NYC is insane

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

eldercare update

The family "war" is about to erupt. 

To the best of my knowledge, Shelley still has not been to the rehab to see Marvin, and she hasn't called the rehab to find out how he's doing.  If you are the caregiver, you should express at least some concern about the person you're taking care of, right?

Drew, on the other hand, had a long talk with the caseworker at the facility.   He expressed his concerns that Shelley is unreachable -- she turns off her phone when she goes to bed at night.  He told the caseworker about the clothes incident on Saturday. 

And he told the caseworker that he's concerned about Marvin going back to Shelley's house.  Marvin has had mobility issues for awhile now, he's had to rely on a cane.  On Saturday he told us  that when he goes to dialysis, he uses a wheelchair because his legs are so weak.    The stoop at Shelley's house has three steps and no handrail, and we don't know that Marvin will be able to maneuver those steps.  And his bedroom is on the second floor. 

So now Drew is the designated "caretaker" as far as the rehab center is concerned, and he's the person who will be consulted about Marvin's ongoing care.

No surprise there.  Drew is the one who took care of his father.  And he did it long distance -- Drew's father was assisted living in Florida for several years, then a nursing home in Florida before Drew arranged to bring him back to Long Island last year.

Shelley will not be happy, of course.  And for entirely selfish reasons.  She cannot afford the rent on that house without Marvin's financial contributions. 

It's going to be interesting around here.

1 comment:

bookworm said...

I feel for you. There may be a family war erupting in my spouse's family too (not over an inlaw, but another relative). I am dreading the upcoming holiday because of it. Alana

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