medical matters
When this message posts, I expect to be at the radiologist's, drining some godawful chemicals in preparation for my semi-annual CAT scan.
Most of the time I can forget that I am a cncer survivor. Most of the time I can feel almost normal.
But then I have to go for some test -- like the CAT scan -- or trek over to a doctor's office for a check-up, and it all comes back to me.
Can you believe it's been 4 years? December 2004. when I walked into Ilene's office, I knew I was having problems, but we both assumed it was hormonal -- just a few months shy of my 45th birthday, it wouldn't have been unusual for perimenopausal symptoms. Ilene scheduled a D & C for the end of January, 2005. I don't know which one of us was more surprised by the pathology report. But 2005 became my nightmare year -- surgery, radiation, chemotherapy. And a whole group of new friends, each with the same first name -- "Doctor".
four years later I am feeling healthy, far removed from those agonizing days.
but I am very high maintenance now.
And that fear is always in the back of my mind.
wish me luck, guys, for another clean bill of health.
Most of the time I can forget that I am a cncer survivor. Most of the time I can feel almost normal.
But then I have to go for some test -- like the CAT scan -- or trek over to a doctor's office for a check-up, and it all comes back to me.
Can you believe it's been 4 years? December 2004. when I walked into Ilene's office, I knew I was having problems, but we both assumed it was hormonal -- just a few months shy of my 45th birthday, it wouldn't have been unusual for perimenopausal symptoms. Ilene scheduled a D & C for the end of January, 2005. I don't know which one of us was more surprised by the pathology report. But 2005 became my nightmare year -- surgery, radiation, chemotherapy. And a whole group of new friends, each with the same first name -- "Doctor".
four years later I am feeling healthy, far removed from those agonizing days.
but I am very high maintenance now.
And that fear is always in the back of my mind.
wish me luck, guys, for another clean bill of health.
Aww, hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteThat C word is damn scary. It's amazing that four years have passed-almost to that coveted 'in remission' title. As if that will erase the fear.
you know, most people feel invincible until they have to deal with a serious illness. then, those of use who have been sick, well, we never forget, even when we do feel healthy.
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