life in and around NYC is insane

Monday, November 4, 2013

Welcome to my world

As this is the second straight month I have participated in NaBloPoMo, I (hopefully) have pulled in a few more readers.

Welcome to my soap opera life!

I am known around the internet as "songbird".  I am a woman "of a certain age" (as people would have said in more genteel times).  In my life I have played many roles.  these days I am playing the roles of career woman, mother,  girlfriend, daughter, sister...

I've been blogging since October 2008.  Occasionally I go back and read old posts, and see how my life has changed over these last five years.

My career does not define me...or does it?  When I graduated from law school 30 years ago, I had visions in my head of becoming a hot-shot trial attorney.  That didn't happen, and I'm glad.  Because I like having a real life beyond my office.  I work for an insurance company these days.  The work is interesting and challenging, but when I walk out the door at 5:00 I leave the caseload behind me.

My older daughter Jen will celebrate her 23rd birthday in just a few days.  Jen is a very busy woman these days, with a full time job, a second part time job and a load of grad school classes.  We live in the same house, and yet there are weeks where I barely see her.

My younger daughter Becca, 21,  is away at school.  (NYC qualifying as "away" even though we live on Long Island.)  She's in her senior year, and will graduate in May.  She also has an internship in public relations this semester.  Don't know what she plans  to do after graduation, but Becca is smart and pragmatic, and she'll figure it out.

The man in my life is Drew.  My ex husband.  Yes, you read that right.  Drew and I were divorced in 1994, had a very bitter divorce.  When the girls got older, and we had less to fight about, we rediscovered each other.  We're older now, more mature, and a lot of the things that drove us apart aren't as much of an issue now.

The girls and I live in my parents' house, with my parents and my three younger sisters.  My parents are in their 80's .  My father is in poor health, needs 24 hour nursing care due to cognitive and mobility issues.  My mother has health issues, too, but she's still capable of taking care of herself -- at least to some degree.  We haven't taken her driver's license away from her, but as a practical matter she no longer drives a car.

My can I explain my sisters?   First let me introduce you to the wonder twins, known here by their initials, F and A.  Identical twins, they might as well have been conjoined because they act as if they are permanently attached to each other. In their 40's now,  they never learned to separate from the parental home, never learned to get a job.  Until recently it was like having two perpetual teenagers in the house, living through my children.  These days  the wonder twins have their hands full, providing most of my father's "hands on" nursing care.  Part of me feels sorry that they're the ones bearing the brunt of my father's care, but part of me ... well, they've lived off my parents for their entire lives, it's time to "give back".  I barely talk to the twins.  Lots of issues, we haven't been good to each other ... but I never told either of them that "you're dead to me, you're no longer my sister."

My other sister, H, is going through a difficult time.  She recently had to give up her apartment and move back home to the family  looney bin.  After she lost her job and her unemployment ran out, she struggled on for awhile, but now she's given up trying to find employment in her field and has enrolled in a grad school program in another field.  When she finishes this degree program she will be very employable.

Rounding out the cast of characters are three felines, two in the parental loony bin and one at Drew's house.

Mr. Kitty is a self-rescued cat.  There is a pond/nature preserve about half a mile from the house, which has served as a "dumping ground" for unwanted cats.    We think Mr. Kitty was dumped there, and in fact I have seen other cats that look just like him in the woods.  He showed up on our back deck one day in September 2001, when he was about 4 months old.  At the time we had three other cats (all of whom have crossed the rainbow bridge).  When we first saw him on the deck we mistook him for our cat Daisy, who had marking similar to Mr. Kitty's.  My mother didn't want a fourth cat...but 13 years later, he's definitely ours.

Redford was a fully grown tom when he showed up at our door a few winters ago.  He's a ginger cat, and I think he's a Manx -- very powerful hind legs, and a bobbed tail.  Hence the name, "Bob" Redford.  Very sweet cat, even before he was neutered.

And then there's is Drew's cat, Duchess.  She was born at an animal shelter in June of this year, and adopted by Drew in September.  She's a cute gray kitten, rapidly growing into an adorable cat.  Becca named her Duchess, after one of the cats in that Disney movie, "The Aristocats".  She is definitely feline royalty.

So, as I said, welcome to my crazy, insane, weird, soap opera life.


Mike Regione said...

A nice "get to know you" piece. I just started in September and it is a bit overwhelming at times. good luck with the daily posts.

songbird's crazy world said...


Nora said...

Hey, Songbird! Very interesting family you have there! It was a very entertaining blog post :D

songbird's crazy world said...

There's a reason I call it my "soap opera life"1

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