life in and around NYC is insane

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

the difference between love and martyrdom

The other day A screamed at me that she and F gave my daughters love and that they were there for my kids when I was not. They were at my kids' school MORE than any parent. They were living vicariously through my girls. They had so much time on their hands that they could hang out at cheerleading or play rehearsal, etc. Kids began to call them the "red aunts" because of their long red hair. All the kids at school knew who the "red aunts" were. Many of the kids loved them. Some laughed at them behind their backs. They had no other responsibilities, no jobs, no other commitments. They "helped" around the house but didn't have the responsibility a SAHM would have. So of course they could hang out at school. I admit, I was a bit jealous at times. I was around for activities as much as any working parent, but I would have treasured the chance to be there more often. But bills don't pay themselves and I never got the chance to be a stay at home mother. There were kids who knew about the "red aunts" who didn't even know Jen and Becca. Yeah, make a career, make a life out of hovering over your nieces instead of getting a job and making a life for yourself. It's like living with four teenagers, only two of them are growing up. And the other two . . . 44 going on 14. Living off their parents, no idea what they will do with the rest of their lives. Nope, can't say I envy them now.

2 comments:

MJ said...

WOW. I mean...WOW. I watch my nephew for my sister, because she has to work and I am (recently) fortunate enough to be home with my kids. Before, when she was married and a SAHM and I was working full time, she watched my kids. Neither of us would ever DREAM of telling the other that she wasn't there for her kid(s) just because she had to work. That's B.S. right there.

How do your daughters feel about the situation?

songbird's crazy world said...

Yeah, welcome to my world.

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