songbird's crazy world

Becca was still in high school when I began this blog.  hard to believe she will graduate from college on May 17! Today Drew and I put down a deposit for a party room at a local Italian restaurant.

Since I've been sharing -- The 2008 posts: http://songbirdscrazyworld.blogspot.com/2008/12/wall-street-tree.html  http://songbirdscrazyworld.blogspot.com/2008/12/nyc-at-christmas.html The 2009 trip: http://songbirdscrazyworld.blogspot.com/2009/12/new-york-at-christmastime.html The 2010 posts: http://songbirdscrazyworld.blogspot.com/2008/12/nyc-at-christmas.html http://songbirdscrazyworld.blogspot.com/2010/12/christmas-in-nyc_12.html No trip into the city in 2011 -- that was the year I was under the weather all month. And last year's post -- no photos, but a good description: http://songbirdscrazyworld.blogspot.com/2012/12/nyc-christmas.html

So we figured that the Friday after Christmas would be a good time to do our annual NYC "windows" trip.  The city was only slightly less crowded than it would have been before Christmas. We took the train to Penn Station (32nd and 7th), and that's where our adventure began. Lovely shot of the empire State building: Our first stop -- the windows at Macy's.  Macy's always does two sets of windows.  This year the 34th Street windows featured a "Yes, Virginia, There Is A Santa Claus" display -- Macy's sponsored the animated show on TV a few years ago.  It's cute, but honestly, the "Miracle on 34th Street" display, which saluted the original move, was a better set of windows.  The Herald Square windows had a fluffy bit of froth about dreams and believing.  Very nice. Fortified with hot dogs from a street vendor, we walked over to 5th Avenue.   Lord & Taylor did lovely windows, all about high fashion in years gon

Yesterday we went to NYC to see the Christmas decorations -- full report will follow shortly. We did a lot of walking.  And I do mean a lot.  Given my age, weight, medical issues and lack of activity, it's no wonder I was limping by the end of the day. And today I am in pain!  Seriously, all of my muscles hurt as if I'd run a marathon.

All stereotypes, good, bad or indifferent, hold a grain of truth.  What do Jews do on Christmas?   We go to the movies and eat Chinese food, of course.  If it's good enough for Justice Kagan, it's good enough for me. Yesterday Drew, and I and our friend Flo went to the movies.  First show of the day, reduced admission costs, popcorn for breakfast.  We saw American Hustle .  Set in 1978, it's a fictionalized version of the ABSCAM scandal.   It's an interesting story of manipulation and moral ambiguity.  I barely remembered the scandal, had to Google it.  Political corruption at  its "best" -- the scam netted a mayor, several congressmen and even a US Senator.  Loved the nostalgia, the fashions and music of the 70's. Later, a group of us went to dinner at Jani.  I'd never been to the Hicksville location before, though I've enjoyed numerous meals at the Wantagh and South Huntington locations.  This location is relatively small in comparison

So we were driving through Hicksville (yes, that is a real town, you can look it up) and Drew said to me "There's a house you should see." The house is in a side street, just off the  main road. Every conceivable space on the walls and the roof is covered in a variety of lights, multicolored and blinking beautifully.  Every inch of the lawn is covered in figures -- Santa, reindeer, snowmen.  It is gorgeous. Over the top. And then there's the house next door.  Simple display of white lights formed into an arrow.  And next to the arrow, a single word: DITTO

Local movie theater has a program called "Silver Screen".    For a small fee you get a classic movie, popcorn and soda. Today we saw It's A Wonderful Life. A Frank Capra classic.  Jimmy Stewart.  Donna Reed.  Lionel Barrymore.  A story that always makes me cry -- and in a theater full of people the emotional intensity is magnified. And when you see a classic on the big screen, you are bound to notice details you can easily miss on TV. The themes resonate even today. A wonderful film, well worth the $2 .

The perfect place to go after reveling in the early 1960's nostalgia of Saving Mr. Banks, we grabbed a bite to eat at Johnny Rockets. We've been to the Deer Park location many times, but had never been to the Hicksville location.this location is at the Broadway Mall, but the only access is from the parking lot.  Which may explain why is was fairly empty at 8:30 PM on the Friday before Christmas. It's like walking into a hamburger joint or ice cream shop circa 1962.   Red and white decor, Coke posters from way back then, servers wearing crisp white "soda jerk" hats, "oldies" music piped in.  The chain's slogan is "The Original Hamburger", so it should come as no surprise that the menu features burgers, hot dogs and sandwiches, but they also serve salads.  And shakes and floats are prominently featured. I ordered the Route 66, a burger with Swiss cheese, grilled onions and grilled mushrooms.  Very juicy burger, keep the napkins cl

Winds in the east, mist coming in.  Like somethin' is brewin' and bout to begin.  Can't put me finger on what lies in store,  But I fear what's to happen all happened before.  I was four years old and it was the very first time I went to a real theater, and of course it was the fabulous Mary Poppins that my father took me to see.    So of course when  heard about the movie Saving Mr. Banks it immediately went on my "must see" list. We saw it Friday night, and it did not disappoint. This is very much a Disney movie, but it is not a movie for children.  The focus of the movie is on P.L. Travers, her traumatic childhood in Australia, and her relationships with Walt Disney and the Sherman Brothers.  The movie explores dark themes about childhood traumas and how they make us what we are as adults. But it's told within the framework of the two weeks Travers came to California to meet with Disney and develop  Mary Poppins as a film.  So there is To

I hold several licenses related to my employment.   My licenses have continuing education requirements.  NY employer periodically arranges all day symposiums to help us meet those requirements. Today's session was set for 9:10 AM at our corporate headquarters in the Wall Street area.  My plan was to get to the office by 8:45, choose my seat and get my coffee well in advance of the start time. Famous last words. My plan was to catch either the 7:16 toi Brooklyn or the 7:21  to Penn Station and the take a subway to Wall Street. Got to the station just as a train was leaving.  Thought it was the 7:16.  Turns out it was the 7:08, running late.  Turns out the 7:16 has been cancelled and the 7:21 will make extra stops to accommodate those passengers - the Brooklyn train is a local and the NY train runs as an express, so our ride will take an extra 10 - 15 minutes.  And  the 7:21 is running 15 minutes late. And the train is going to be super crowded, so I anticipated standing all th

Drew and I are going to spend a day in the city, looking at the decorations.  This year we're going to be smart about it, and go AFTER Christmas Day, when the crowds will be a  bit lighter.  I promise not to bore you with thousands of photos, but I will post a few interesting ones if I can. Our visit  in 2010 -- http://songbirdscrazyworld.blogspot.com/2010/12/christmas-in-nyc_12.html and last year's -- http://songbirdscrazyworld.blogspot.com/2012/12/nyc-christmas.html

So in October and November I participated in NabloPoMo.  Part of the reason you participate is to get new readers to your blog, and part is to discover new blogs to read, new "friends". Today I had to drop one of my new-found "friends".  The blogger wrote something that really got under my skin.  I wrote a response in the comments section, which she apparently did not take well  -- within 15 minutes or so of my posting the comment, she posted another entry in her blog, addressing my comment.  I don't really want to get into a battle with her, so I deleted her blog from my news feed. I've only been reading her blog a few short weeks, but I feel like I just dropped a friend.

. . . Could comfortably sleep with her head hanging over the edge of the bed.

And once again we are dealing with the issues of an octogenarian. This time it's Drew's uncle Marvin, his father's younger brother. I've mentioned some of the issues before. Marvin is 87 years old.  He and his wife never had children.  Several years ago, after his wife died, Marvin moved in with Drew's sister Shelley.  Shelley needed a roommate, someone to pay rent and utilities.  Shelley is not the type to be caring for an elderly relative. And that was fine when Marvin was still relative healthy, still employed and still independent.  Neither she nor Marvin has a lot of money, but together they could manage the rent and utilities on the house. Shelley cannot manage the rent without a roommate. But in the last two years Marvin's health has deteriorated considerably.   He's been in and out of the hospital  and rehab several times.   He probably should be in assisted living. Adult Protective Services has been involved since last summer.  Last summ

I discovered Tolkien when I was in high school.  The Hobbit , a lighthearted fantasy, a pure adventure story .   And then the Rings trilogy, a dark, tragic story with roots in Norse mythology, a serious story with all the elements of a classic epic journey.  Even though the books take place in the sane akternate universe and involve some of the same characters, it's hard to see a real connection. So I couldn't help but wonder how they were going to stretch The Hobbit , this light, fluffy novel, into three movies. The answer, of course, is to add subplots and back story, to make the tale of Bilbo Baggins and the Dwarves a true prequel to the Rings trilogy. Last night we saw The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug.   This is the second installment of the trilogy, and while it drags a bit in places, it serves as a very interesting "bridge".  We get to meet Legolas, we get to meet the dragon Smaug up close and personal, we see Bikbo use the Ring,  and we get our first re

Can I just say that I love Ben Stiller? Drew received an offer for two tickets to a sneak preview of Walter Mitty, which opens Christmas Day. Loosely based on the James Thurber short story, but very different from the 1947 Danny Kaye movie, this version tells the story of an employee of Life magazine who leads a very boring life, and who "zones out" while experiencing rich fantasies.  Everything changes when he loses the negative for the photo destined to grace the final cover of the magazine before it shuts down. I'm not going to say any more, except that the movie is both humorous and heartwarming, and that I knew where the plot was going before it got there.  Definitely worth seeing.

Actor Hal Holbrook created a one-man show called M ark Twain Tonight, which he has performed regularly for about 59 years.The broadcast by CBS in 1967 won him an Emmy Award. Of the three runs on Broadway (1966, 1977, and 2005), the first won him a Tony Award. We were fortunate to see Holbrook in this show at the Tilles Center last weekend.  What an amazing performance.  Holbrook performs for two hours,  sharing Twain's opinions on Congress, the monarchs of Wall Street, organized religion, science, evolution, the condition of mankind... His opinions are surprisingly modern. Wonderful performance.  Interesting show. 

"Pinelawn." Say that to any Long Islander, and they know what you mean.  Point your car to the intersection of Long Island Avenue and Wellwood Avenue, in Farmingdale.  You will find a small, seldom-used railroad station surrounded by ... Pinelawn Memorial Park, the Long Island National Cemetery, St. Charles Cemetery, New Montefiori Cemetery... It was rainy and cold on Friday, when our little group gathered together.  Our destination was the National Cemetery.  Drew's father was never one for religious ceremony, but his service in the United States Army during World War II was something he held dear.   And so Drew chose the National Cemetery as his parents' final resting place.    It was a simple funeral, 14 of us gathered beneath a canopy near the columbarium.  The honor guard, two soldiers in dress uniform,  played taps, and folded up a flag to present to the family.  Then each of us spoke a few words about Drew's father and mother.    And then the funeral di

I don't usually tell other people's stories, but this one was too funny to pass up. Two weeks after hearing it, I am still laughing. The story involves a friend of a friend. Let's call her R. She is an older woman, never married, socially conservative. You might say straight-laced. Very old school. R lives alone. Her brother J and his family live in the house next door. J is retired from a position in law enforcement. Over the years R has come to depend on her brother J for many things. So when it came time to decorate for Christmas, of course J did R's front yard as well as his own. R notices that one of the inflatables, a Santa figure, is facing the house. She doesn't know why Santa is facing the wrong direction, but she figures J will fix it eventually, and she doesn't give it any more thought. But she starts to notice that all the cars in the neighborhood stop in front of her house to gawk at her decorations. Not admire, gawk. So one day she

An official policy of racial segregation formerly practiced in the Republic of South Africa, involving political, legal, and economic discrimination against nonwhites. Evil goes by many names.  Apartheid.  Genocide.  Slavery.  Holocaust.    It has lived in every country of the world. Those who fight against such evil have truly earned their place in heaven. Rest in peace, Nelson Mandela. "For to be free is not merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others."

Found myself in East Meadow last night, running an errand in the same shopping center where Pita Lovers is located.  The lure of felafel could not be overcome. This is a storefront, meant primarily for take-out, with a handful of tables if you choose to eat there. The felafel sandwich is very filling, no need for a side dish.  Felafel was light and crisp, salad was fresh, pita was soft and warm.    Next time, though, I will have to ask for extra tahini -- there simply wasn't enough on this sandwich. Broccoli cheddar soup was thin, not creamy, and had large chunks of broccoli.  Not bad but not memorable either. They also serve souvlaki, burgers, etc.  Hummis sounded tempting. It's no Souvlaki Palace.  But it's a nice place to grab a bite when Greece starts calling your name .

I am a woman of many talents.  I play many roles -- mother, daughter, lover, friend, employee, volunteer. But the most important function of all? I know how to open a can of Fancy Feast cat food. Or, at least, that's the thinking of three of my admirers. Three feline admirers, as you might have guessed. Mr. Kitty and Redford have a lot of people who feed them and take care of them.  It's no wonder they expect food from me, I've fed them often enough. But Duchess?  She's a kitten.  She's Drew's kitten.  When he first brought her home I didn't want to feed her because I wanted her to bond with Drew. But last weekend I gave her a can of Fancy Feast. And now the little demon asks me to feed her.  She wraps herself around my ankles as if to say "Welcome to the staff." What can I say?  I live to serve.

112 Ocean Avenue, Amityville, NY. Repeat that address to any Long Islander of a certain age, and we immediately know what you are talking about. It was the Amityville Horror, the scene of a vicious murder and a famous haunting. On November 13, 1974, Ronald DeFeo Jr. shot and killed his parents and four siblings.  The DeFeo family had lived in the house on Ocean Avenue since 1965. George and Kathy Lutz purchased the house and moved in in December 1975 and lived there for 28 days, claiming they were driven out by paranormal activity in the house. In 1977 they published a book, and in 1979 that book became a movie. Swarms of flies. Glowing red eyes. Greenish-black slime on the stairs. Pig-like demons.   Native American burial grounds. Scary stuff. Was their tale real, or was it a hoax? I don't think anyone really cared.  And hordes of curious teenagers came down Ocean Avenue to gawk. A quiet, dead-end street in a quiet suburban town became an impromptu tourist attraction

One of the scariest times of the 70's... From July 1976 through August 1977, he terrorized the City and its suburbs.    He was preying on girls with long, dark hair, mostly in lover's lanes.  He was known as the .44 caliber killer for the type of gun he used to shoot and kill his victims. Later, in letters left at the various crime scenes and sent to Daily News columnist Jimmy Breslin, he referred to himself as "the Son of Sam."  His ramblings were psychotic, but his aim was deadly.  He killed six and wounded many others, all on the orders of the voices in his head, which he attributed to his neighbor Sam's black Labrador.  He was caught because of something so simple as a parking ticket, which put him and his car in the vicinity of the last shooting.  Ultimately he pled guilty and was sentenced to six life sentences... I was 17 in the summer of 1977, going out with boys who actually had cars and were able to drive on our dates.  Although all the shootings

This is one of my go-to places when I'm craving Greek take-out. They do have a few tables and booths, of course, and it always seems busy in there, but for us it's strictly take-out. In addition to souvlaki, they offer a variety of burgers, sandwiches, salads and traditional Greek entrees. My favorite here is the chicken souvlaki, huge chunks of grilled chicken, lettuce, tomato and onions in a warm, soft pita, served with traditional tzatziki. Chicken gyro is also excellent. Greek salad is huge and easily shareable. Lamb souvlaki is tender and flavorful. We don't usually order dessert, but while I was waiting at the counter for my order I saw the waitress serve up a couple of rich and creamy Greek specialties that almost made me change my mind. Staff is efficient and caring. The older gentleman behind the counter -- I believe he's the owner -- actually apologized to me because I had to wait for my food, even though my having to wait was my own doing, not the

Hit the Trifecta Saturday night.  Good friends, good food and good entertainment. The evening started at Matteo's. We'd eaten at the Matteo's in Huntington awhile back and really liked it, and thought the Bellmore location would be good, too.  We were not disappointed.  Food is served "family style", sort of.  A half order serves one, a full order can be shared by two. We started with caprese salad -- fresh mozzarella and tomatoes.  Not bad, but I'm sure it will be better in summer with vine-ripened tomatoes.  Fried calamari was light and crisp and not chewy. Veal franchese was tender and sauce was tart without being overpowering.  Pasta was perfectly cooked.  Marinara sauce had whole cloves of garlic -- yummy. And I seem to be on a dessert kick -- got talked into ordering tortoni, creamy vanilla ice cream topped with toasted coconut. And then it was on to the Tilles Center for a performance by Manheim Steamroller.  I alwats liked this group but wasn't

Loved this place the first time we tried it, so of course we had to go back. Once again we had the rodizio.  Loved every juicy bite of the meat, enjoyed the sides. But what really impressed me:  dessert I seldom eat dessert, but since others at the table chose to order . . . I tried something called natas-do-ceu, which the menu translates as "Heavenly Whites" but is more commonly known as "heavenly cream".  And aptly named.  This incredible concoction was served in a parfait glass.  The scrumptious white cream --the waiter said it was heavy cream whipped with egg whites -- was layered with cookie crumbs and I think there may have been a touch of cinnamon.  Light and sweet but not cloying, a perfect ending after such a robust meat meal.

Last week Drew's sister  invited us to her union's annual holiday party.  Drew knows a lot of his sister's friends, so the conversation was relaxed and comfortable. We were talking about Social Security, and how those of us working now are paying the benefits of current recipients, and how our benefits will be paid for by our children, And one of the women said something about "the kids today don't really work." How lucky I am to be able to brag on my kids, who want to work hard and who are lucky enough to find appropriate jobs. Jen, of course, has always known she wants to work with children.  She has always worked with kids -- day camp jobs, volunteering with Jump Start, work study as a teaching assistant in an elementary school, then a full time job as a teaching assistant in a nursery school, and now a paraprofessional in an elementary school. When she finally finishes her Master's and gets her teaching credentials, she will have logged many ho

So last week, during the observation of the 50th anniversary of the JFK assassination, I loved seeing the newspaper reprints.  The Daily News, Newsday, everyone did a reprint of their 11/23/63 editions. And I found something interesting on the CBS News website. Two interesting items, actually. First was the website's coverage of Kennedy's death.  They live-streamed the 1963 broadcast in real time. In this post-CNN world, we are used to 24 hour coverage of the news.  And when something horrible happens, like 9/11 or Dandy Hook, we know that our TV networks will drop everything and stay with the story.  And they know how to cover such a story. Watching parts of the CBS broadcast from 50 years ago...they knew they had to be on the air, but it looked like they were inventing the media as they went along.  Cronkite in the news room instead of at his anchor desk so that he could receive and read printed bulletins as they came off the wire.  Telephones ringing in the backgro

Nora   has nominated me for a Liebster Award.     As I understand it, I am now supposed to answer a few personal questions, then choose other blogs I wish to honor, and give them a set of questions to answer.  here are the questions Nora posed, and my answers. 1) If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be? Hard to answer.  I'm from Long Island, I'd love to live in Manhattan.  But I can also see myself in Florida.  I've never been to Israel, but I think living in Tel Aviv would be interesting.  London could be fun.  Lots of places ... 2) What is one think you miss about being a kid? The feeling that no matter what happened, my parents could make everything all right again. 3) Who is your favorite actor or actress?  Tom Hanks. 4) What is the best piece of advice you’ve received? Not to worry about what other people think, just do what makes you happy. 4) Are there any foods you’ve never had but would like to?  I think I'

Happy Hanukkah!  Happy Thanksgiving! Thanksgiving, the quintessential American holiday.  The fourth Thursday of November.  A day of parades, football, family gatherings and turkey.    Pilgrims and Indians.  The unofficial start of the holiday season. Hanukkah, a minor Jewish holiday, a festival of freedom (Definition of a Jewish holiday:  they tried to kill us, we won, let's eat.)  Candles in the menorah, latkes, dreidels, jelly donuts, presents, family gatherings.  Judah Maccabee and the miracle of the oil. Hanukkah is an 8 day holiday beginning on the 25th day of Kislev in the Hebrew calendar.  Because the Hebrew calendar is a lunar calendar, Hanukkah can begin as early as the last week of November or as late  as the end of December, or any time in between. In 2013, on November 28, the first day of Hanukkah and the American holiday of Thanksgiving will coincide for only the second time since Thanksgiving was declared a national holiday by President Abraham Lincoln. The la

I heard a familiar voice on the radio the other day, one I had not heard in a long time, promoting a new off-Broadway play . . It was the 1980's, and talk radio was becoming popular. And on Sunday nights  -- late, late on Sunday nights -- there was a show.  Sexually Speaking with Dr. Ruth Westheimer.  A little old lady, a Jewish mother with a hauntingly familiar accent,  was dispensing sexual advice.  Well, of course we sniggered.  But then, we listened.  And we learned. We heard her on the radio, we saw her on tv.  Only 4'7", she was warm, friendly, humorous, willing to poke fun at her own image.  A very recognizable personality throughout the 80's and 90's. But it wasn't until later, when she was promoting her book on grandparenting, and I heard her being interviewed on the radio . . .I heard her talking about her grandchildren with the delight any Jewish grandmother has, and then she said something chilling:  "Hitler didn't want me to have gra

When the phone rings in the wee hours of the morning, it's never good news.  We think, "Who on earth is calling me at this hour?  It better be important!" We think, somewhat facetiously, "who died?" And then comes the realization that someone did, in actuality, pass away. Drew's father died Monday night. It was not unexpected.  Emil was 90 years old and in very poor health.  Monday evening Drew told me: "The nursing home says my father has a bad fever.  I think this time it may be the end. They wanted to know whether I want a DNR. . . " So when my phone rang in the wee hours of Tuesday morning, it wasn't really a surprise.  Drew sounded shaken nonetheless.  He felt lost.  Should he go to work or stay home? I told him, "Stay home.  You have to tell your sister, you have to tell your uncles, you have to make final arrangements." What I was thinking:  "You need to process this loss, you have to deal with your feelings, you

Hate, hate, hate speaker phones. The most over-used, obnoxious gadget in the office. I never used to have a problem with them. I mean, if you're driving in the car and you need to carry on a conversation, a speaker phone is a useful device.  Eyes on the road.  Both hands on the wheel.  It's great. In your own home, no problem at all.  Let's say there are two of you at home, and the landline  phone rings. And both of you want to talk to the caller.  Using the speaker phone might be a better option than one of you picking up the extension in the next room. Not to mention, picking up the extension in the next room isn't an option if you're using a cell phone. Speaking of cell phones . . . I don't run into this frequently,  but if you're in Starbucks or at a restaurant or on the train --or any public place where your cell phone conversation should be soft, hushed, so that you don't disturb the people around you -- using the speaker phone is not a

Every now and then, you just want to spend a Saturday night playing board games and catching up with the stuff you DVR'd.  That's the kind of night for take-out. Smokin' Al's, to be precise. For us, this restaurant is strictly a take-out place.  The restaurant is very small, the wait for a table intolerably long.  But the food. . .we have other BBQ restaurants closer to home, but we drive 20 minutes to Al's and 20 minutes home, with the car smelling like BBQ . . . We place our dinner orders on line.  Makes it very convenient. They offer choices, lots of choices.    Different types of ribs, different barbecue sauces, from sweet to spicy.  Pulled pork, brisket, chicken. We both ordered babyback ribs with Al's original sauce.  Sauce was tangy but not spicy hot.  Meat was tender but not "fall off the bone".  Heaven. Sides dishes -- we both ordered garlic mashed potatoes.  A little heavy on the garlic, and a bit too thick, they need more cream,

If it seems like I've been lost in let's rememb er . . . Yeah, I know, I've been focusing on the 70's a lot lately. But I am trying to figure out how the dark-haired rebel whose music enchanted me has become the bearded, distinguished, professorial gentleman whose music still delights me . Well, we all have a face that we hide away forever, and we take them out and show ourselves when everyone has gone . . .   The music, the cover art. I can see the album covers in my head.   I played the vinyl on the stereo in my basement.  The cassette tapes and my portable cassette player found a home in my dorm room.  I listened late at night, through headphones. . . I've got the ol d man's car, I've got a jazz guitar, I've got a tab at Zanzibar . . .  Funny, I never fell in love with him, never put a picture of him on my wall, never imagined myself married to him.  Didn't scream when he was on TV.   He was no teen idol. He was better. When you l

I never read any of the books, but I loved the first Hunger Games movie.  And really looked forward to this second installment. And was satisfied with the results.  It's not as good as the first movie, but does set up the third movie quite nicely -- interesting cliffhanger ending (No, I won't spoil it for you). All the elements are there -- dystopian society, huge gap between the haves and have-nots, sick competition, the seeds of rebellion. Makes for an interesting movie.

I used to really like holidays. Now they leave me stressed. When Drew and I were married and the girls were little, we'd spend all of the holidays with my parents.  Drew's parents lived in Florida, so we had no need to juggle, to split our time between his family and mine. When we divorced, the children split their holidays, spending some with me and some with him.  And it was ALWAYS contentious.   And now?  Now it's a delicate negotiation. And right now I am ready to scream.  Because no one talks to me, no one tells me what's going on. My assumption was that Thanksgiving dinner at my parents' house would be in the evening, as it has been every year.  So when Drew said he wanted ti make Thanksgiving at his house at 2:00 in the afternoon,  I thought: "Great.  The girls and I can lunch at Drew's and dine at my parents'.  Works out nicely." After all, that's what we did two years ago.  (Last year Drew was recovering from surgery to re

My mother tells me that I was watching TV when it happened, that I saw Jack Ruby shoot Lee Harvey Oswald. I have no memory of the shooting, or, for that matter, of anything to do with the assassination of JFK.  At least, no contemporaneous memories of the weekend it actually happened.  I was only three years old at the time, and the significance of what I'd witnessed was so far over my head as to be invisible. (I have some vague recollections of Bobby Kennedy's funeral, some 5 years later, but that's for another day.) For years everyone would ask each other, "Where were you when Kennedy was killed?"  People just a few years older than I would tell stories of tearful teachers at school.  No crying teachers for me, I was home playing with my dolls. The most significant news story of the early 1960's, and I have no memory of it.  But yet, I know all the details.  I've seen the TV news clips, I've read about that day in Dallas in fact and in

With all the restaurant reviews I have published of late, you would think I never eat at home anymore. You'd be wrong. I don't do much cooking anymore -- my sister F seems to have taken over my mother's kitchen -- but it has become my job to do the grocery shopping.  Yes, somehow it has become my responsibility to feed 8 people and two cats.  Ostensibly I was just shoping for nyself and my daughters, but . . . Well, not all the shopping.  My mom buys a number of things in Costco, and my sister H picks up a few items in Trader Joe's, Target or CVS. But the bulk of our food supply comes from Shoprite. H usually makes up the list and emails it to me.  I shop with my tablet in my hand, checking the list as I make my way through the store. My first stop is the deli kiosk.  The kiosk is really just a computer screen.  You place an order from the items offered, and when you come back to the deli counter your order is waiting for you in the refrigerator.  Very helpful